Debt: Nobody Said It Was Easy

(Originally published on The $76K Project on 4/10/2018) 

Money in the $76K household is tight. We're awaiting medical bills related to the Kiddo's appendectomy, and although it's possible that the total cost of surgery won't be as high as I'm expecting it to be, I'm still very much on edge about it and want to keep a tight grip on the budget until we know where we stand. At the same time, we're determined to make a significant credit card payment this month ($1000) and plan a small but fun birthday celebration for the Kiddo.

Although we're paying all of our bills on time and making progress with debt repayment, there isn't a lot of room for extras and non-essentials:

• We still don't have a real kitchen table. We're eating off a tablecloth-adorned card table and sitting in folding chairs. 
• We've had to delay the purchase of other furniture, such as bar stools for our kitchen counter. (The horror!)
• We're not going out to eat as often this month.
• We're being more selective about paid activities. The Kiddo's summer soccer league is a go. The running series is not.

I'm not complaining about any of the above items. The card table serves its purpose, we make tasty enough food at home, and I can walk out my front door and run for free every day. We're good.

However, we've come to the realization that our uncompromising budget will necessitate one difficult sacrifice: we'll likely need to cancel the trip that Fortysomething and the Kiddo were planning to take back east this summer. The original idea was to have them fly out, rent a car, and spend two weeks with Fortysomething's parents, siblings, and other relatives. It's something Fortysomething hasn't done in several years. The Kiddo barely remembers what his cousins look like.

Needless to say, nobody is happy about this, especially my son and his grandparents. But the trip seems financially ill-advised given the likelihood of steep medical expenses. The price of plane tickets will be in the hundreds of dollars, even if we're able to offset the cost with our limited Southwest points. Then there's the car rental, the gas, and the inevitable restaurant meals and kid activities. We just can't afford it, is the truth.

Fortysomething is fine with canceling. As usual, he's Mr. Logical: we don't have the money, thus we can't go, end of story. Me? I feel tremendously guilty. I know how much his parents were looking forward to seeing both of them, and as they're getting older, I want them to spend time with us. Life is fleeting, and we need to make time - and sometimes spend some money - for the people we care about.

But is it worth accruing more debt at this particular time? I don't know. I don't think so, but in this case, I'm not 100 percent sure. Either way, it feels like a risk. A part of me is holding out hope that the medical bills will be miraculously low and we'll be able to book the trip anyway.

As anyone who has ever tried to dig out of debt knows, this process is full of ups and downs, triumphs and frustrations, successes and setbacks. Life is damn expensive. Even though we have the best of intentions, and even though we're armed with the confidence that comes with paying off $17K in less than a year, it would be incredibly easy to backslide - not because we're buying lattes, avocados, bar stools, and fancy vacations, but because life is unpredictable and full of gray areas. 

I'm not complaining, but I will say this: times like this emphasize just how debilitating debt can be. Debt sucks. I'm sick of the way it limits us. I'm sick of having to make sacrifices for it. Situations like this just stoke my determination to get out of debt as soon as we possibly can. I can't wait.